Science
Beards Home to 400 Types of Wildlife
A study published this week in the Journal of Ornithological Weirdness claims that beards are home to about 400 types of wildlife. The study has prompted calls for beards to be considered official conservation areas, which would make trimming them a potential breach of the law. Brian Malburn, the lead author of the study said: […]
Hairy Bikers Turn Out to be Ant and Dec
The worlds of entertainment and science have been rocked by the revelation that the ‘hairy bikers’, otherwise known as Dave Myers and Si King, are actually a middle-aged Ant and Dec who have time travelled from the future. The discovery happened during the first day of shooting for ‘I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of […]
New Theory Reveals That We’re all Either Rats or Pigs
An intensive new study recently conducted at a university with too much spare time has revealed that all humans can be categorised as follows: they all look like either rats or pigs. The study, by the University of Gonk, covered a twelve month period and featured at least four human specimens and two puppets. The puppets, […]
Scientists Discover That The Last General Election Put Us into An Opposite Universe
Scientists at the European Space Agency have discovered that the last general election pushed the planet Earth into an opposite ‘mirror’ universe. In a new paper, the ESA state: “The public reaction of abject horror following the success of the Conservatives was so strong, that it propelled the Earth into a parallel universe where everything […]
Human Ancestors Split From Chimps Because of Dispute Over a Rock
Recent Research undertaken by the University of Wallasey suggests that human ancestors split from chimpanzee ancestors because of a dispute over a rock. Up till about ten million years ago, the human and chimpanzee ancestor was one and the same. Then something happened which caused our mutual ancestors to split and to evolve separately. Dr Kevin […]
The Sceptical Poet 