World

Donald Trump Taps Father Christmas for Foreign Secretary 

Donald Trump Taps Father Christmas for Foreign Secretary 

Father Christmas has been appointed to Foreign Secretary in the upcoming Trump administration. The bearded globetrotter was considered the ideal choice to export Trump’s version of America across the world. Donald Trump explained his choice at a media conference by tweeting via his mobile to the journalists standing right in front of him: “Nic is […]

Donald Trump Sadly Still Perfectly Well

Donald Trump Sadly Still Perfectly Well

The US has been hit by revelations that presidential hopeful Donald Trump is perfectly healthy. Footage has been released on several occasions that show Trump speaking unintelligibly into a microphone with a look of confusion on his face, a common symptom of Alzheimer’s. He is also known to exhibit random exclamations of an extreme racist […]

Hipster Trunks Manufacturers Still Waiting for Increase in Sales

Hipster Trunks Manufacturers Still Waiting for Increase in Sales

Manufacturers of men’s hipster trunks are still waiting for the current increase in hipsters to lead to an increase of sales of their ridiculous underwear. We caught up with Phil McGregor, CEO of Melvin Stein Underwear: “It goes against all our prediction. Our products are called hipsters. They themselves are called hipsters. It should be […]

American Guns to be Hidden inside Kinder Eggs

American Guns to be Hidden inside Kinder Eggs

In a bid to reduce the number of mass shootings in the US, President Obama has passed a bill stipulating that all guns for sale in the USA will from now on come encased in giant kinder eggs. Kinder eggs are banned in the USA because of a genetic deficiency in North Americans which means […]

Captain America Shot Dead after a Child Falls into his Enclosure

Captain America Shot Dead after a Child Falls into his Enclosure

Lovable US superhero Captain America has been shot dead by the army after a child fell into his enclosure during a school trip. The incident happened yesterday morning. It is believed the child climbed the five foot wall around the enclosure while his parents weren’t looking, hoping for a glimpse of ‘the Cap’. Once fallen […]