Out of This World
Surf Board Manufacturer Announces New ‘Mars’ Range
Following the news that there is running water on Mars, surf board manufacturers Board Stupid have announced their new ‘Mars’ Range. The stylish boards are specially weighted for Mars’ gravity and come in a variety of Mars-themed designs, such as ‘Totally Recall, Dude’ and ‘The Surfer Chronicles’. Board Stupid are hoping to appeal to the […]
New ‘Church of Doctor Who’ Collapses Into Chaos After Peter Capaldi Signs Autograph as the Thirteenth Doctor
The new ‘Church of Doctor Who’ religion, started last month by a fan in Cardiff, has collapsed into chaos after actor Peter Capaldi signed an autograph for its founder as the thirteenth Doctor. “Peter Capaldi is not the thirteenth Doctor,” fumed the Church’s founder James Hartnell (name changed by deedpoll), “He is the twelfth. Matt […]
World Famous ‘Secret’ Superspy Recognised and Shot to Death
World famous ‘secret’ superspy James Bond has been murdered by a hail of gunfire in a Monte Carlo casino. Onlookers report a well-dressed man ordering a drink at the bar, before introducing himself to a nearby woman by saying, “The name’s Bond, James Bond’. At this point, all hell broke loose, with several customers in […]
‘I Am Bigger Than Corbyn’, God Announces
God has gone on record this week to confirm once and for all that he is most definitely, without doubt, almost certainly: “Bigger than Corbyn.” God’s press release stated: “As you seem to have forgotten, I would just like to remind you all that I am bigger than Corbyn.” Speaking exclusively to thescepticalpoet, God snorted: […]
New Species of Human Found in Cave Turns Out to be Elvis
The new species of human found in a cave in South Africa has turned out to be Elvis. Long rumoured to still be alive and well (or abducted by aliens, or working in a chip shop or singing in Blackpool), the mystery of Elvis Presley has finally been solved and the answer is: all of the above. Elvis told […]
The Sceptical Poet 