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Registrar Refuses to Issue Marriage Certificate for Blairite and Corbynite


A registrar at a register office in North London has refused to issue a marriage certificate for a Blairite and a Corbynite, saying it goes against her views as a Labour supporter.

Ann Jenkins has been suspended pending an investigation into the incident, which happened yesterday evening.

“I can’t in good conscience do what I don’t believe in,” Ann told us. “It is against the ethos of the party and everything it stands for. It also makes me feel uncomfortable, which really swung it for me.”

The offending couple were horrified.

“I couldn’t believe it,” said Sam Colton, who would have been Sam Frewer. “I’m very much old school labour, while my partner Jim is a confirmed Tony Blair fan. Politically, he thinks image is more important than principle, while I think the opposite, but on a personal level we just agree to disagree. Ultimately, we are equal in the eyes of the Labour party.”

Jim agreed:

“Sam and I love each other and that’s all that matters. We go to all the conferences and take part in all the campaigns. Why should it matter who’s the more militant politically?”

Ann remains unrepentant, despite potentially facing jail:

“We could end up in the wilderness, just like the days of Neil Kinnock. The labour party created Blair and Brown, not Blair and Red.”

Speak, or forever hold thy tongue...

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