Tag Archive | Labour
Labour No Longer Even Backed by D:Ream
Labour have been left disappointed after it was revealed that their former cheerleaders, pop band D:Ream, no longer support Labour. The band’s song Things Can Only Get Better became the official anthem for Labour’s 1994 election campaign, helping them into power despite the general message being really fucking cynical if you think about it. D:Ream […]
Man Accepts Pay Rise After Being Promoted
The UK has been rocked by a rugby-snubbing socialist who had the gall to accept a pay rise after he was promoted. There’s a rumour that he also accepted a company car, has started wearing a tie occasionally and snubbed the Queen. “This is on par with the time the Manic Street Preachers took their […]
Registrar Refuses to Issue Marriage Certificate for Blairite and Corbynite
A registrar at a register office in North London has refused to issue a marriage certificate for a Blairite and a Corbynite, saying it goes against her views as a Labour supporter. Ann Jenkins has been suspended pending an investigation into the incident, which happened yesterday evening. “I can’t in good conscience do what I […]
David Cameron Warns UK that Father Christmas is a Threat to National Security
Prime Minister David Cameron has angered seasonal holiday apologists with a tweet accusing Father Christmas of being a threat to national security. The full tweet, now removed and replaced with a voter-friendly anti-Europe rant, reads: Father Christmas is a threat to our national security, our economic security and your family’s security. Twitter users were quick […]
The Sceptical Poet 