Tag Archive | David Bowie
Bowie Killed by Martians for Revealing Their Secrets
Professional conspiracy theorist and shit-stirrer Mohammed Al-Fayed has claimed that the Martian equivalent of the Triads were responsible for the death of David Bowie. “Yes, he was killed by cancer,” he told Rita Sarpong of Conspiracy TV, “But who knows what kind of technology they have? They could have poisoned him with cancer cells from […]
Grim Reaper Fired for Reaping Celebs Before their Time
The Grim Reaper, real name Darth Balls, has finally been caught and fired after going off-grid and reaping celebrities that annoyed him. Concerns were first raised about Mr Balls a few decades ago, when the song Don’t Fear the Reaper by the Blue Oyster Cult was released. He was caught ranting at a cocktail party […]
Elton John to Release Bowie Tribute Version of Candle in The Wind
Elton John is to release a special David Bowie tribute version of Candle In The Wind, to be played in his honour at an upcoming tribute concert. The Sceptical Poet is proud to have been granted an advance view of the new lyrics, reprinted here for our readers: Martian In The Sky (in memoriam David […]
Young Musician Refuses to Become Famous Until He’s at Least 70
A 19 year old singer and songwriter has refused to become famous until he’s at least 70, on the off-chance it could kill him if he doesn’t. The guitarist from England, who wishes to remain anonymous, claims to have turned down a record deal and only advertises his songs on Myspace where no-one will see […]
David Bowie’s Son to Sue NASA for Failing to Find Out if There is Life on Mars
The film director Duncan Jones, son of the late pop legend David Bowie, has threatened via his twitter account to sue NASA for failing to answer his father’s question: is there life on Mars? “My father was asking ‘is there life on Mars?’ for 45 years, and yet NASA failed to find an answer. I […]
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