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Ken Livingstone’s Foot to be Evicted from his Mouth

By World Economic Forum from Cologny, Switzerland [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

By World Economic Forum from Cologny, Switzerland [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

Ken Livingstone’s foot has been given its marching orders after outstaying its welcome inside the mouth of their mutual owner.

The foot has stayed in Mr Livingstone’s mouth several times over the years. At first regarded as a lovable scamp, his increasing tendency to turn up unannounced and barge his way in has finally turned the mouth against him.

“It’s just ridiculous,” said Mr Livingstone’s mouth. “He always turns up at the worst time. Everything was great, and now he’s plonked himself right in and won’t leave, and no-one will have anything to do with us anymore.”

The foot has promised to leave, but past history means Livingstone’s hand is sceptical.

“He’ll be back. He always comes back. And I always yank him out and put him back in his place. I don’t like him. He’s anti-semitic. Probably. Maybe.”

When asked his personal opinions on the matter, Mr Livingstone replied:

“Mmbcph mpf m mhhnmf fnm HITLER hmf fmnp.”

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