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Grim Reaper Fired for Reaping Celebs Before their Time

The Sceptical Poet

By InSapphoWeTrust from Los Angeles, California, USA (Grim Reaper, Greenwich Village) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons By InSapphoWeTrust from Los Angeles, California, USA (Grim Reaper, Greenwich Village) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons The Grim Reaper, real name Darth Balls, has finally been caught and fired after going off-grid and reaping celebrities that annoyed him.

Concerns were first raised about Mr Balls a few decades ago, when the song Don’t Fear the Reaper by the Blue Oyster Cult was released. He was caught ranting at a cocktail party held by the King of Sleep, saying:

“Don’t fear me? I’ve come to kill you! Don’t they realise how bad this is for business? Bloody musicians, I should reap the lot of them.”

No-one thought much of his comments back then. Mr Balls was known for getting worked up when drunk. It wasn’t until years later when it was revealed that he’d secretly been reaping oysters way before their time that his employers began keeping an eye…

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