The Reaper was sacked last year for reaping musicians that annoyed him, but was re-instated recently after doctors insisted he’d since made a full mental recovery.
“He’s definitely fucking fired this time,” said his employer, Fate. “Every five minutes he reaps another poor soul. Still mostly musicians and comedians, except he’s branching out to wrestlers now, so I’m told. Limbo is backed up, there’s nowhere for anyone to go.”
We caught up with the latest celebrity to pass over, the soul formerly alive as Prince, standing bewildered in a queue of celebrities in Limbo:
“What the hell? I was only 57. I wasn’t even ill. Hey, is that Victoria Wood?”
It is thought that the Reaper is still at large.
A letter was found in his flat this morning about creating the underworld’s ‘biggest ever variety performance’.