The singer Seal has been spotted off the coast of Canberra surfing on a humpback whale.

The usually reticent singer was spotted by beachgoers yesterday afternoon. He appeared to be singing, and was followed by musicians who played it safe using a boat. He stayed upright for about five minutes before eventually succumbing to the ocean.

One beachgoer said:

“It was so weird. I didn’t recognise him at all at first. He hasn’t had a hit for a while, and he was quite far away. But then I heard his voice coming across the water and I knew it was him.”

“He sounded a bit scared,” said another. “I suppose he doesn’t do that kind of thing often.”

The Sceptical Poet managed to catch up with Seal later on. We asked him what the hell he was playing at:

“It was a publicity stunt,” he admitted. “Like the Beatles performing on top of that rooftop. It was never meant to be a humpback. We were looking for a killer whale. I would stand on the head singing the words to ‘Killer’, while Adamski would be on the tail end with his computers and sunglasses. But we couldn’t find one. In the end we had to go with a humpback, and I sang ‘Kissed by a Whale’, which didn’t work at all to be honest with you.”

Shortly after we spoke to him, Seal was taken away by animal protection officers ‘for a quiet word’.