Pop star Thom Yorke had a shock last weekend when a fan mentioned to him that he was still in Radiohead.
“What? We split years ago, didn’t we?” he exclaimed in surprise.
When the fan informed him that not only had they not split, they’d even released the odd album, a confused Thom immediately tried to buy the albums from a local HMV, but was informed by staff that the albums were only available free on the internet, or at an extortionate price on vinyl.
“Why would we do that?” he exclaimed to a reporter later, when he’d managed to hear all the albums post OK Computer. “Give them away? That’s mental! Have you even heard them? There’s a song on one of them that sounds like a man singing through his arse in a bath.”
A police investigation is under way. Detectives believe that the hacking group Anonymous are responsible for all of Radiohead’s output from Kid A up to The King of Limbs. There is concern that they may have infiltrated other bands, maybe even other areas of the media.
A police spokesman said:
“The liberal democrats have been acting really weirdly for a while now. George Lucas has been under surveillance ever since The Phantom Menace. It’s a little more difficult to tell with music because there’s so much shit about. There are some in the force who believe Anonymous has created up to 85% of the western world’s musical output over the last few years. Then again there are some in the force who think 85% of all recent police activity is the result of Anonymous.
“That’s probably true.”